I was so bugged and frustrated with my kids. They were so naughty and loud and were honestly driving me crazy. So many of my thoughts were focused on "I'm missing so much because of these two." "Can we just shut our mouths for just a second so I can hear a complete thought from someone, anyone!" these are just a sample of what I was thinking and feeling! The humbling moment came when I was in the bathroom doing my hair and my makeup when the choir started singing "I Feel My Saviors Love". Kris and the girls were in my room watching and Molly started to sing with the choir. As I heard these words I was truly humbled. I started to bawl which was not so good for my makeup application.
"A long time a go in a beautiful place, Children were gathered 'round Jesus. He blessed an taught as they felt of His love. Each saw the tears on his face. The love that He felt for His little ones I know he feels for me. I did not touch Him or sit on His knee, Yet, Jesus is real to me.
I know He llives! I will follow faithfuly. My heart I give to Him. I know that my Savior loves me.
Now I am here in a beautiful place, Larning the teachings of Jesus. Parents and teachers will help guide the way, Lighting my path every day. Wrapped in the arems of my Savior's love, I feel His gentle touch. Living each day, I will follow his way, Home to my Father above."
As I sat listening to my little 4 year old sing this my heart felt sad. How was I so ornery and impatient and just mean. I was grateful for those amazing primary teachers that she and Stella have both had and song leaders that would teach her these truths though song, prayer, word and deed. My reslove was that I had two of our Heavanly Fathers choice spirits in my care, I felt strongly that they both had sat at their Saviors feet. I have not been the perfect mother since (and my children are far from perfect as well). I know I will fall short many more times in my life, and on a daily bases, but what I got out of that song and hearing Molly sing along was the most important message I needed at that moment and for that session.
That night when Kris had gone to priesthood session I was kind of feeling bummed that I wasn't doing something fun with my sisters for girls night, but thought I should turn my energies to doing something to prepare for tomorrows sessions. I realized that my lack of preparation had let to me feeling frustrated and all the other feelings I was having. Had I prepared better for the girls to have things to keep them busy things would have gone a little better. So I went to work.
1) I put up the tent. Friday night we had been on our way home and Molly and I had this conversation....
"Oh my gosh! Do you know what tomorrow is?"
Molly: "What?"
Me: "conference!"
Molly: "Yeah! We get to put up the tent!"
We have been doing the tent thing for a few conferences. This is the inspiration for the tent. We have been doing it a while this is what we do with it. Long story short we read (In the childrens BOM the story of King Benjeman and how the people gathered to hear him give instruction and testify of Christ, then we talk about how conference is just like that and what we can learn form it.
2) Insted of putting up the bed in the tent I put a table nicely set for breakfast. Also would provide a place were they could color and do their projects.
3) Our darling Primary president (Really there is no one quite like her. LOVE HER!) send us all an email I think last confrence with a link to sugardoodle with conference packets for all ages, Nursery, Jr primary, Sr primary, Youth, and adults. I printed off the packets and then put them in folders with the girls names on them.
Sunday morning I got up and went to work on breakfast. My cute brother and sister in law had invited us to their house for breakfast, but my kids really are not quite enought to watch confrence with anyone and Stella wasn't really feeling up to pare so we stayed home, but the stuffed french toast sounded amazing so I found a recepe and that's what we did, It would have been way more fun and I'm sure better with Cameron and Siarra, but we were going to make the best of it. So I got up and went to work on the french toast. It turned out ok, but I have made a few tweeks that make it so much better!
the girls enjoyed breakfast and then went to coloring.
Again my kids weren't perfect on Sunday, but they were much better. I loved so many talks on sunday and was so uplifted and yet felt so guilty and felt the resolve to DO and BE better! Loved that talk. I also loved the child rasing 101 and 505. There were so many that I loved Sunday and was really uplifted and edifyed. I was so tuched when so many talked about Japan, hearing stories and reading others journals of all that has happed. All in all I loved conference again and can't wait for the may editon of the Ensign!